HUG Corner: Thought for the Week - July 31, 2017
"Healing After Loss" Martha Whitmore Hickman
"…All those who try to go it sole alone, Too proud to be beholden for relief, Are absolutely sure to come to grief."
- Robert Frost
Those who, out of pride or for any other reason, try to go it alone are in for a hard time.
Nowhere is this more true than in dealing with the loss of a loved one. We are already lonely – for the one we have lost. To be sure, no one can fill that particular space – and we wouldn’t want anyone to – but that emptiness does make us more needful of loving supporting relationships in the rest of our lives.
The work of grief is hard work, and we need people to help us – to listen, to & hold us, to remember our loved one with us, to give us their wisdom.
There is a story of a little girl who got home from visiting her friend later than her mother had expected. When her mother asked the reason for the delay, the child said, “I was helping Jane. Her doll broke.”
The mother asked, “Did you help her fix it?”
The child said, “No. I helped her cry.”
We all need people to help us cry.
Healing After Loss (Martha Whitmore Hickman)
"She thought of the women at Chicken Little's funeral...What she had regarded since as unbecoming behavior seemed fitting to her now; they were screaming at the neck of God, his giant nape, the vast back-of-the-head that he had turned on them in death. But it seemed to her now it was not a fist-shaking grief they were keening but rather a simple obligation to say something, do something, feel something about the dead. They could not let that heart0-smashing event pass unrecorded, unidentified."